The Crappy Missionary and Baptism

The crappy missionary:

This is an Elder Rowley story written with his permission.

Also, this story is kind of gross so reader beware. 

Tuesday we had dinner at the B's house like we normally do. It was pretty apparent Elder Rowley had to use the bathroom by the way he kept shifting around in his seat with a panicked look in his eye. He shoveled his food in his mouth and excused himself to use the restroom. 

Brother B and his son somehow started talking about Fallout 4 mods and they kept teasing me because I couldn't play it. The teasing escalated to a point where Brother Badgetts tried handing me a ps4 controller but I resisted the urge to grab it so he just set it down on top of my folded arms it was all very fun but after that the two of them had to leave the room and I realized Elder Rowley had been in the bathroom for almost 30 minutes and we had to get going to an appointment pretty soon. 

Side note: missionaries are supposed to wait outside the door when their companion is using the bathroom but the bathroom was within sight and sound of where we were sitting so I wasn't breaking any rules.

I got up to go see if he fell in or something and I noticed the door was open. Elder Rowley was just standing there with a ghastly white face. He started mumbling something that sounded like, "we need to leave."

"Why, what's up?" I said, "did you throw up or something?"

He started mouthing something but his face was pointed down so I couldn't make out what he was trying to say.

"What?" I asked again.

He started mumbling but all I heard was, "Its on my shirt."

"What, like poop?" I chuckled sarcastically.

Just after I said that he turned fully towards me, and lo and behold my sarcastic comment was correct. He had poop on the front of his shirt. 

Now, I know what you're all thinking because I thought the same thing: 

How.

How does one get their own excrement on the front of their shirt?

I stood there mortified for a few seconds before I was able to speak,

"How?!" I whisper shouted at him. 

He just shrugged. 

I probably could've teased him about it right then and there because the whole situation had become ridiculously funny. 

But, I realized that as his companion, I was in the same boat he was and so if anyone found out about this my name would be forever be associated with the story of the crappy missionary. Also, because I realized that Elder Rowley would be pretty embarrassed if this got out.

I ran and grabbed both our bags and quickly thanked Brother B. for the dinner but explained that we had to make an emergency errand. He knew something was up and said he'd walk us out to our car. 

As we walked, the three of us could barely control our laughter. We all knew what was up but no one wanted to say anything. 

We got in the car and drove towards our apartment and for the entire 15 minute drive we laughed until we almost passed out. It was easily the 2nd or 3rd hardest I've ever laughed in my life. The first of course, was that time Ike Gardiner almost wet himself in that haunted house last year. 

Baptism:

We baptized C**** and C****** this week! I guess that's not really a story but nonetheless Elder Rowley and I are proud to be the first missionaries in Mexia this year to have  a legit baptism. Its awesome to see how the gospel has really changed them. You can see the brightness in their eyes and how much happier they've become. Truly, it is remarkable what the gospel can do for people.

 

The first time we met C**** he was smoking a massive cigar and barely acknowledged us. During the lesson the family barely spoke to us and I had a horrible allergic reaction to their 16 cats. Now, they talk to us constantly and C**** always says hi to us when he sees us out. I'm still allergic to their now 18 cats though but I guess some things were bound to stay the same. 

 

But, we have to remember that baptism isn't the end. Until we know that they'll endure to the end we won't sleep easy.

In the coming weeks we're also going to try to get V****** and B******* baptized too!  

My new scripture of the week is James 2: 14-26, faith without works is dead.

Picture: me n' Elder Rowley and the S***** family.